Yeah, back in the pre-now, when survivor first aired Stateside, I remember a guy saying “Arrrr….it’s a dickhatch” in reference to Richard Hatch and his butt pirating. It’s catchy, no? See it’s his name, annnd what he does. Get it? Ahahaha. ha. Ever since that fateful day the line has been inextricably attached to any mention of Survivor, Pirates or Rich himself in my little brain. Just wanted to inflict that on you as well.
Anyway, today is an important day. Today marks some unknown number of years that I have continued to forget this holiday. Every. Freaking. Year. I forget it’s Talk Like a Pirate Day until it’s too late. I mean seriously, how many times can I forget this. The only result is more bitterness and poorly told stories from my past. I’m putting this holiday in my calendar, and if you’re still reading next year I’ll write something good as a reward. It’ll be here before you know it. Possibly before I know it, but I have that reminder. God.
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Posted by: TimeSyphon in Food
As the jingle went, “Almond Joy’s got nuts, Mounds don’t.” I took this for granted for years, blissfully ignorant to the forces that controlled my very foodage. No more! What am I talking about? Coconut. Yeah, what does that have in it? Nut. And it’s in bofum. Both. Of. Them. The other day I realized Mounds do have nuts. Proud of my newfound realization I went to Wikipedia to crush my enthusiasm. Turns out coconut is not part of the nut “family.” I says that if nothing else they’re freaking adopted.
Classroom: Nuts can be fruit or seed, coconut is a fruit with nut in its name.
Someone needs to come clean. Did the Hershey group (or Peter Paul himself!) force nuts to kick out their coconut brethren? Are Mounds merely Castrato Almond Joys? Are those the nuts they speak of? Until I know for sure, I say they both have nuts. But, to be PC (and not mock the Castratos, poor bastards) I’m calling Almond Joy’s little wonders “growths.” Kind of like huge tumors under your chocolatey goodness.
I’m going in for more research, just for you, the kind-hearted reader. So far all I’ve found is this bra
.
Right now I’ve got Weird Al in my head. Sometimes I feel like a nut, or like a nut is singing to me about feeling like a nut.
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I don’t mean detractors. Ever get involved in a bunch of stuff, none of which can be finished in the short term? Yeah, life. Anyway, among my other responsibilities that I have no intention of speaking about here, I am intentionally adding this one. Long put off and long needed, this release just has to happen. So here it is, a day late and a dollar short. Not so much a responsibility as an outlet for all the others. Ref: my soul. I’ll probably end up adding whatever song is on my mind, like all the blogs, because I like music.
Why? Why would I do such a thing as add my internal babble to the already cluttered internet? Aside from the fact that I can, I honestly hope someone gets a chuckle out of this site. Maybe even a chortle. Possibly their first taste of a song or movie they never knew they liked. Maybe even enlightenment. If you find enlightenment here, through my words, you might need a good doctor. Hell, even a bad doctor. I’ve spent a good portion of my life taking in things in from the internet (henceforth most likely intarweb) and for a very long time I’ve just wanted to get my hands a little dirtier. Curse your bad luck for bothering to read what may be the most useless post I make. My statement. I hope the rest are a bit more interesting, you don’t really have to come back. But, what if you miss something?
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